I Talk To the Moon

Phantasia 1971 s/t album cover
Currently Reading: 
Black Metal - Evolution of the Cult by Dayall Patterson
Fool's Errand (Tawny Man #1) by Robin Hobb
Stoner by John Williams
Today's Playlist: 
Anno Domini by Tormentor
s/t by Mayfly
s/t by Phantasia
The Holly Bears the Crown by The Young Tradition with Shirley and Dolly Collins
The Lady and the Unicorn by John Renbourn

A few years ago I discovered a bootleg of a band called Phantasia. It's self-titled private press album from 1971. The record is a soft and dreamy take on late period psych and early prog. The yearning vocals work exceptionally well with the disconsolate lyrics, nearly all of which are drenched in despair and sadness. In its fragility it is beautiful. Yesterday I received an official German CD (circa 2002) from the World In Sound label. It features a sizable booklet comprised of the lyrics from the album and its bonus tracks. Most fascinating, however, were the lengthy liner notes by John "Depugh" Cavanaugh, the lyricist and drummer. I never before read a band history in a CD booklet that began: "My name is John Depugh. My father was dysfunctional. Instead of standing me in a corner for discipline, my dad locked me in a dog cage." It goes on from there to detail both the formation of his band (along with some deaths through accidents and some members being drafted) and the abuse he suffered at home. Several paragraphs later, there's this: "My egomaniac father decided it was his calling to save the world from communism and formed a paramilitary organization. Quickly convicted of various crimes, he jumped bond and went underground hoping to incite a revolution to overthrow the US government." Our hero is sent by his mother to live with his father after graduating high school in order to bring the family back together. His father is trying to live happily with his "concubine" on his compound. Resuming Depugh's text: "When I arrived he screamed in my face, 'You have shit for brains!' until I cringed like a dog. I just wanted to hide somewhere and smoke some cigarettes. He just wanted to beat my shitty brains out for embarrassing him in front of his recruits." And so it goes on with his father in solitary confinement in Federal prison and the band amounting to series of dead ends. At the very least, Phantasia left behind something of value who those who seek it out.